Dear Mama
by IamFreckly
Summary: When Sasuke decides to check in with his Mother after all the past years.


Accepting the strokes of fate doesn't come easy, in fact sometimes the hand that someone is dealt is never accepted, they refuse to acknowledge what has been laid before their feet. But Sasuke had long been aware of his destiny; he was to become strong, resilient enough to avenge his family by taking the life of his treacherous brother with his own bare hands. Yet life had a funny way of twisting things, it was as if Lady Luck was purposefully tormenting him at every turn.

Sasuke sat alone in his dingy ryokan apartment, the colours that once inhabited both the walls and his spirit having long been stripped away through years of life grinding away against them. Both were now mere skeletons of their past selves, mere ghosts of their former glory. Sasuke leaned against the tattered wall, his pallor as washed out as the wall that supported him; he stared vacantly at the blank scroll that was sprawled across his lap as the ink brush that inhabited his hand lay lifeless.

His thoughts drifted to his Mother. If only she was here now to see him now: broken and shamed. His face twisted into a grimace at the very thought it; he pondered how she would react to him, would she even recognise him? He had so many things that would go unanswered. So many things to tell her and she would never know.

So many tears that have been left un-wiped.

Sasuke sighed softly as he closed his eyes for the briefest of moments before he opened his lead like lids and stared at the parchment once more determined to finish what he had begun. He dipped the brush into the obsidian ink, the excess liquid trailing back into the seemingly endless murky pool.

Then he began to write:

_Dear Okaa-san,_

_I'm not too sure what to write, it seems like an entire lifetime ago since you were here. I'm ashamed to admit that I can barely remember what you look like but I doubt that you would be able to recognise me either. I hope…I hope you're happier now, wherever you are, Otou-san too. I wish I had gotten to say goodbye properly, not the dreary send-off that was given to you; you deserved a much brighter farewell, not the premature service you received…_

_I graduated the academy though, perhaps not as quickly as Itachi did…but I done it. I got stuck with that Dobe Naruto and Sakura; we had Kakashi-sensei teaching us, we were Team 7. You probably would have liked Naruto he smiles a lot like you do; I might call him an idiot and look down upon him, but I do respect him Okaa-san. That's one thing you taught me Okaa-san, to respect people no matter their background; I know it doesn't come across much if at all…but I do._

_That's something I'm grateful you taught me whilst you had the chance._

Sasuke paused momentarily his own dark orbs transfixed on the onyx ink as the air gently caressed it, teasing it dry; he had so much to say but struggled to find the right words to express what he meant. The last time he wrote to his mother was just after the massacre but admittedly back then his hand was not legible; back then the paper was smudged by tears, the saline water eradicating the words that once clung to the paper. But things were different now, he wasn't the cowering little boy that was afraid of the shadows.

Now he was the man that lived amongst them.

_Did you know what Itachi had to do? Did you know that he was forced to kill his own kin, to kill you? I was…I was __so__ angry and confused, I didn't understand why he would do such a thing, and to you of all people?! Why Okaa-san? Just why? Have you forgiven him and do you think he would forgive me? I have so much to tell him Okaa-san, so much to ask him. But most of all I wish I could tell him I'm sorry. I was such a fool not to see the truth behind his deceit, he is my brother! I should have known better than that! But now…now I'll never get the chance to say I'm sorry and it kills me knowing that. If he is with you? Can you tell him I'm sorry? Tell him that I love him and that I'll do him justice. Tell him that I will be the brother he can be proud of and…_

Sasuke paused and grit his teeth together in attempt to stop the tears that had gathered in his eyes, they clinging to his ebony lashes determined not to fall. He inhaled deeply leaning his head against the wall feeling his chest tighten as the years of memories flooded back all at once, it was like a stormy tsunami had crashed down upon him without remorse. He wish he had known from the start what Itachi was going through, that he had told him what the village had done, if he had things could have been so different.

Perhaps he wouldn't be so alone.

And his family would still be with him.

_I do miss you Okaa-san, I know I don't show it on the outside. But on the inside I carry you next to my heart, next to Itachi and Otou-san. I know that one day we will all be reunited, together at last. But not too soon I'm afraid, I still have things to do, things to set right. Nevertheless one day we will meet again and things can go back to how there were. I'll write to you again soon, I promise._

_Until then._

_Forever your son, _

_Sasuke._


End file.
